Demotion

Okay, I'm actually not sure if that's even a word, but I used it. Yep, I got demoted today. 

PSYCH... Promoted. Yep, I did it. So I work at Extend Health. I have been there for about there for about two and a half months now. It is a healthcare exchange for retirees. I absolutely love working there. My lovely supervisor, Shawnee Byles told me to apply to this new position about a month and a half ago and said she would refer me. Well, she did and I just got the job. Today was my first day. So far, easier and higher pay! Who could complain. Not me. I am so blessed. I will be working as a Client Support Specialist Assistant - the name is ever changing. Who knows what I will be called tomorrow. Basically there are nine senior client specialists and they each have three assistants. Well, I am one of those nifty assistants. We all got new desks, computers, and chairs. I am so excited. I actually start tomorrow I believe. Hope this turns out to be Grrrreeeeeeeeeeaaat! 

This is how I feel today. 

On the downside of the day, Mike has not emailed me nor his fam. Who knows what is going on. I hope to hear from him soon. I am trying not to be worried. 

A Best Friend Date

Well I just have to say that I have the best, most amazing friend in the world. We were both complaining about how starving we were for hours tonight. She was talking and talking while I was trying to upload pictures and blog. Then, I told her to stop talking to me for a second and write her feelings on paper. I was in deep concentration. I know, I'm rude. So she writes her feelings down on a card and this is what I receive in turn.

So, yeah. I'm pretty lucky. So we got ready for our date. I really didn't have any clothes over at her house so she gave me some jeans and a hoodie. Yes, we were even matching. How cute. 

I know, we're cute, huh? And also the best of friends. So we made our way to the great Old Spaghetti Factory. We had such a fun time. We got our usual Mizithra. 

Our waitress was very jittery and that called for lots of laughs. When she talked to us for the first time and then walked away, Madi said, "Dang, I wanted tonight to be my big tip night." Haha so she has been wanting to leave someone a big tip for a while now, just like a Random Act of Kindness. But this didn't seem like a good one for her to do. The lady practically came running up to us and yelled, "What can I get for you guys?" She didn't even introduce herself or anything. Real weird. We really had a great time and actually got into some deep chats about personalities and how everyone is so different. And just life in general. I love when we have deep talks about stuff like that. We loved taking lots of pictures on our date night. 

After dinner, we went to Walmart and just bought a bunch of random stuff. We were both just really in a spending mood. We had some great laughs too. We stole a cart that looked like it was being used, had some nail polish disappear and then reappear, I tried some nail polish on in the store, and yes, we spent our whole life's savings. We were there for two whole hours. What a night! 

I love nights like these. I love my dear friend. She is always by my side. I am so lucky. Love ya, Mads! Thanks for dinner. And thanks for being a good boy friend. Pun! Madi knows what I mean. 

A First For Everything

Well, it's that wonderful time of the year when Homecoming comes around. Of course I am not going because my days of that are far gone. However, Mike's little sister, Erika got asked by Drew Christensen. She was so excited that she was going to go! It's her first dance, as she is only a sophomore. I was so happy when she asked me to do her hair and makeup. Of course, I am not too skilled in that area, so I brought my pals, Madi and Taylor. Taylor did the makeup and Madi curled her hair. I pinned the curls. They left the easy job up to the infant. We had so much fun! Erika looked beautiful. I'm sure she will have a great time. I love her to death. 

Also, before we got started with all of that, I trotted around Mikey's room smelling his things and rehashing old times in there. We even put on his hats and took a picture. I also snagged his favorite hoodie and wolf shirt, which I love. I will be sleeping with those. They even smell like him. Bonus! Here are some pictures. I miss my boy. 

My Fave

The People In My Life

I’ve heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true
But I know I’m who I am today
Because I knew you:

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
What can I say if I’ve changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for the good

A Changed Person? Maybe

You know, missions can really change a person, but it is all for the better. Now, I am not saying this because I served a mission. I do, however, feel that I am an intricate part of a special someone’s mission. While Mike has been on his mission, I have seen such a drastic upbringing to my life. It is like this extremely bright, sunny light is shining down on me always. I just have so much energy and so much passion about everything I have been doing. Being that it is very unusual for me to be like that, I have been in an utter state of shock lately. I almost went into a coma. Okay not really – just go with it.

While reading the magnificent book Dressing Your Truth: Discover Your Type of Beauty by the one and only, Carol Tuttle, I think that I truly discovered myself for the first time in my life. You know, now I just get myself. I get it. I get why I act the way I do. It all just makes sense. I know this sounds redundant and perhaps a tad bit cliché, but it was like a light bulb went off. I had a major A-HA moment. Okay, well I discovered that I am a type four personality. That being said, I am the strong, timely, stubborn, closed off, bold, striking, constant, keen, precise, authoritative, polished, structured, clean, simple, grounded, reflective, misunderstood, and the list goes on and on. So that is pretty much me in a short little list… uh hemm, I mean long list. Sorry Charlie. So in that book it explains how you are and why you are the way you are. It is pretty awesome to say the least. There are all the negative things about myself that I have looked at for so long, but now it all makes sense. That is just my nature. Often times, the type 4 person will try to act different or change themselves. However, you should not do that. It is vital that you act natural. If not, you will simply shock people. Something that I also learned about myself is that us Type Fours are unapproachable. With that being said, it is up to us to reach out to people because people will be intimidated by us. Makes so much sense! Well.. enough about that. I just am so grateful for that book.

I really feel like I am being so blessed for letting my love go for two years so that others could be sealed to their families for eternity. Blessings are coming to me, in fact, they are pouring in. Life is just working out. I can’t think of anything that I could complain about. It’s practically perfect. I have no idea what happened. I imagined myself being this depressed mess as I watched the love of my life walk away. Yes, I had my moments, but now I just have such a positive outlook on life. I found myself in such a deep rut during the five months before Mike left. I was depressed and I was scared for my life. I was losing my best friend, really my whole life. I almost ruined the wonderful relationship that we had several times, but he always continued loving me even though sometimes it was hard. I was making things a lot worse than they needed to be. Instead of cherishing every moment with him and being HAPPY, I was depressed a lot of the time as I dwelled on our departure that was creeping up on us. I could not focus on anything and my schooling really took the back burner. I hated my job and I did not even try when I was there. All of the relationships in my life were failing and I did not have the energy to bandage them. It was one of the hardest times and I hope to never find myself in that dark place again. I became emotionally drained as I just simply got through each day – I endured and did not enjoy. Months became weeks, weeks became days, and before I knew it, it was time for Mike to leave. I thought that would be the end of me. I really did. I did not want life to go on without him and frankly I did not think it would. Maybe I thought the world would just come to an end or something.

Now, the day came. I was terrified. When we said goodbye, I felt like my life was walking away from me. My heart was being torn from its place inside me. I am being really dramatic, but it’s the best way to explain such pain. I would not see him for two years. I was scared to death. I really do not know how I let him go. As we held hands and walked to the car, he let go and hugged me so tight for the last time. Then, he kissed me. I knew I would miss those lips. I knew I would miss that smell. I breathed him in one last time, got brave, and sat down in my seat of the car. That was it. He walked away. He never turned back. We both cried like babies. We both knew this was not the end. The destination was in our view and we knew that it would eventually come. It would be a while, but it would come. I really am lucky that I have someone who makes saying goodbye so hard. I am lucky to love and be loved. I would not trade love for all the money in the world. So, to get to the point, the night he left, I felt a huge relief lifted from my soul. We had said goodbye. The only thing left was hello and from there – eternity. That night was hard, but life really looked up from there. Blessings have been flowing in ever since. Today I would like to count my blessings. There is really nothing to complain about. Absolutely nothing. Of course I could say exhaustion… but doesn’t that mean that I am blessed to have so many places to be and people to see? Yep.

1. Mike. My amazing love and current missionary. I could never even put my love for him into words. It is near impossible. He’s my other half and he fills every bit of my heart. I know that he is away right now and will be for some time, but he is still such a huge part of my life. What a blessing that boy has been to me. I am so overwhelmed with joy.

2. My family. I am so lucky to have a warm home to come home to every day with all of the people I love there. It’s great to think that I will have a couple more years at home. I love being around my family even though they do get a little crazy sometimes. My parents have been so supportive of all of my dreams I’ve ever had. I love my four siblings. They always love me no matter what and I know that they always will. I know that I need to make a better effort to create time for them.

3. My friends. My friends are definitely better than yours. Madi has always been there for me. We do everything together, including work and school. It is so wonderful to have someone like that. We know every little thing about each other and we can act like freaks and still be accepted by one another. I am so blessed to have her as such a huge part of my life. My other best friend is on her mission in Roseville, California. Natalie is amazing and she is growing so much. I have enjoyed getting her letters every couple of weeks. I can’t wait for her to return so we can start our friendship right where we left off. I’ll count her sweet spirit as another blessing in my life today! I also have to say that I am so thankful for Jennie and Taylor. They are also my best friends. I guess you could say that I have a lot of best friends. We all have so much fun together and I know that they would all be there for me if I ever need anything. I knew that I had great friends when I saw them all bawling just as hard as I was when I said goodbye to Mike. I am also thankful for all of the other friends that I have. There are just too many to mention.

4. All of my grandparents and great grandpa. I have my dad’s parents and my mom’s parents all still alive. I am so lucky to have that. My mom’s dad and step mom live in Ohio, along with my great grandpa. I don’t see them often. Usually my grandpa and great grandpa will come visit every summer. It is great to see them each year. I am lucky to have that time. My dad’s parents just live five minutes away. They have supported me in everything. I can’t think of one thing that they did not attend throughout Junior High and High School. I constantly feel the love they have for me. All of my grandparents are getting up there and I know that I need to cherish and love every moment with them, for we never know when they will be called to the other side of the veil. I love that my great grandpa and I continually write letters back and forth. I cherish that.

5. Mike’s family. They are practically my second family and someday they will be my real family. They constantly show their love for me. They invited me to dinner last Sunday and I really enjoyed my time with them. It is nice to have this time with them while Mike is away so that I can focus solely on all of them and create a lasting relationship. Erika is wonderful. She is like my little sister, except she’s really not so little. She is a sophomore in high school. We talk all the time and we have done quite a few things since Mike left. I love that she feels so close to me. I cherish the relationship we have. I am so lucky to have that and we will continue that on forever.

6. My job. I have to thank Cindy Graff for helping me get such a wonderful job. I work with elderly people every day helping them with their health reimbursement arrangements. They always make my day. I have learned great patience with this job. I love to feel so appreciated here and I am glad that I was able to get away from my other job. It was an unhealthy environment for me. I also love the pay that I am receiving. I am able to pay for school all on my own and I really never thought that would be possible. Definitely a kiss from heaven! (PS I am waiting to hear if I will move to a new department here soon, putting me at even higher pay. So lucky.)

7. My education. I am blessed to have the opportunity to attend college to earn a degree in something I am passionate about. Becoming and elementary teacher was the best idea I have ever had and I know I will love my career. That is so important to me. Less than three years and I am in my own classroom. Seems crazy to me, but I am more excited than you can imagine. I am thankful for all of the wonderful counselors who have helped me along the way and the ones who will help me in the future. I can see graduation in the near future. I can hardly wait.

8. Elementary school volunteering. I love seeing my little ones twice a week. They really do brighten up my day. It makes me so excited for the future classroom of my own.

9. My bed my bed my bed. I love my bed. My bed is there for me every night after a long hard day. I know I can always count on my bed to make me feel better.

10. Health and exercise. I am so blessed that I had something to go to the doctor for back in March. That is when I caught some health issues that needed to be taken care of. I am grateful for healthy foods that actually taste good. I am thankful for the ability to run, jump, and ride my bike. This all keeps me sane. I have found great peace in working out. My stress is eased and I can find my focus again. I will not stop. I can overcome my problems. This is my life we’re talking about.

11. My car. I am so blessed to have a running car that gets me to all of the places that are important to me. She keeps on running and is mostly always there for me. I know that I take having a car for granted.

12. Random acts of kindness. I love to see what wonderful people can do in the world. I love to look for small acts that might make someone’s day. I also love kind people who are kind to me. It makes me want to be kind in return and be a better person.

13. A loving Heavenly Father who continually loves and cares about me. I know that I fall into the funk of life quite often and my spirituality and religion gets put on the back burner. I know that this is one thing that I could change right now. I could make this aspect of my life much better and I promise that I will work on it. I need to pray because I know that there is always someone there. No appointments need to be scheduled, no dates need to be set. All you need is a place to ponder with a prayer in your heart and HE will listen. I do know that. I have seen it and felt it. I am so lucky to be a part of his church.

14. Writing. I love writing. It helps me to get my feelings out. Whoever thought of this thing called writing is an absolute GENIUS. I love to blog and write my life away.

15. Music and dance. I can feel all of my emotions come out when I listen to music. It is something that I can’t picture my life without. If you ever feel down just turn some music on and dance. My friend, Jennie told me how women should wake up every morning and dance for a whole song – just flow with the music and move every part of your body. If you do this, things will start coming to you. I wanted to try this, but so far my sleep has been far too good to want to wake up a few minutes earlier. I already wake up at five every morning as it is! Sheesh.

I know that this blog post has gone on way too long and if you made it to this sentence, I congratulate you. You are awesome. Continue being awesome. I encourage you to make a list. At this moment, I have nothing to complain about. If you just look at all the good around you, life will become easier. You will feel light. Grab a piece of paper and GO! (Or blog if you’re like me.)

Sincerely,

A Very Optimistic Looker

You Do Not Always Get This Lucky

I have been wanting to do this post for a while.

It's about this girl named Madi. 

So, once upon a time… our parents all went to high school together. Awesome, right? They stayed friends after high school and had babies. Some of those babies being me and Madi. Crazy, I know. So we have grown up together with our families always being super close. When we were young, we were both very shy and mostly didn’t talk at all of our family parties. Sometimes we would talk at the very end after we got warmed up, but then it was usually time for the party to end. I guess one time when we were very young, we had a sleepover and I made fun of her feety pajamas – she went home. I do not remember that, but she always brings it up. So that’s how life was. Madi and my younger sister Payton were actually better friends. Madi moved to Vernal for three years. She came back to West Valley when we were in the seventh grade. Let’s just say that things were real awkward at first. The Chapman fam moved into their family’s basement and Madi and I went to school together. I remember the first day her mom brought her to school to sign up for classes. I got called down to the office, not knowing what was going on. As I trudged in with my sneakers on and gym attire, I was quite shocked to see them there because at that point I didn’t really know that they moved back. Madi makes fun of me to this day about how my hair was slicked back into a pony tail all gross. So, she started the next day and I was her tour guide. We really didn’t speak too much at all. In science class, she sat there and stared at her paper. I was so confused. Then I realized she needed a pencil so I asked her and she said she did. Shy as a mouse, couldn’t even ask for a pencil!! I remember her little peanut bun glued to the back of her head, me in my “Woody is my Homeboy” t-shirt. I sure loved that shirt. We always laugh about that day. So let’s just say that things stayed awkward for a while. Madi ended up making friends with all these other people, like Natalie, Taylor, Brooke, Jennie, and some others. We started getting closer in eighth grade, but I did have a best friend, Breanna, at that time. That’s all another story. In eighth grade, Madi had a High School Musical party. I felt quite awkward there in my “Woody is my Homeboy” shirt. But, the next day when everyone left, Madi, Natalie, and I really bonded in a small kiddie pool and a shower in swimsuits to finish the night off. We even shaved our legs together for like the first time. We all started getting really close after that. Natalie is still in the picture too, but this post is just about Madi. So, to cut to the chase, Madi and I got really close in 9th grade and kept getting closer ever since.

Madi is the one who I can always count on. She has been through it all with me. We went to birthday parties together, both got iphones, both bought saturns, got the same laptops to do our math on in 12th grade, passed college math together, worked at Chickfila together, started college together (taking mostly all the same classes), started a new job together just recently, bought the same bikes, set exercise regimens together, we work out together sometimes, and all of the in between fun. She always supported me in dance and was at every performance I can think of. We know every secret possible to know about each other, even the little things that you would tell NO ONE. Yeah, it’s creepy. I could tell you anything about her. She is one of the most thoughtful people I know. I always see her buying things for people at random times. She will listen for hours about anything and give you advice if you want it. She can act like a psycho, too. That’s always entertaining. She is beautiful inside and out. She is going to make a wonderful wife someday. I always say that everyone loves her and Mike. They are both just that lovable type! And I got lucky enough to have two of them in my life and they are very close to me. We do have little arguments, but we get over it quick. I really have never had a big fight with her and look how long we’ve been friends. We just get along. I guess our personalities just mesh.

Madi is best friends with Mike and she loves him. I love that she is so close to him. Mike and I even told her that she could live with us when we get married if she was lonely. She has been there to cry with me at any given time about Mike being gone. She cried just as hard as I did when he left. She can feel my pain and I can feel hers. Not too long ago, she was having a hard time with a boy. We both cried together. I really don’t even know why I was crying. When we see the other cry, then we cry too. Don’t get us going. It’s not hard. We act like complete idiots together and we have even created a voice that we are both excellent at using. Also, don’t get us going. ***WARNING: You might inadvertently catch on, too. Careful.***

Life can get crazy and tiring, but when you have good friends by your side who you can laugh until you pee with, then you know you got it good. All of my friends are amazing and I am thankful for each and every one of them. I just thought Madi deserved her own post because I think I am pretty darn lucky to have her. I hope we stay this close forever. I hope we are like a mom to each other’s children. I hope our husbands are best friends. I hope our little families will vacation together.



And perhaps one day we will both have daughters around the same age who will grow up to be just like us, the best of friends, just like Loyd and Larry.

I love her. 

Team Thor. Wait... Who's Thor?

So I might not be a big super hero fan and I really don’t even know who Thor is.

At work this week, it was “Super Hero” week for everyone in customer service. Each team was assigned a super hero, my team being Thor. We decorated and even got to dress up our supervisors as the super hero, all with only three colored table cloths and some crepe paper. Yeah, we had to get creative. To be honest, our row didn’t really look all that good. Well, me and my OCD mind didn’t think so. It was just kind of messy. People have been decorating all day and dressing the supervisors up. It has been pretty hilarious! I am really not sure why all of this is happening, but I find it quite humorous. Here are some pictures that I sneakily snapped. Enjoy.

Being a sneaky-sneak. No cameras in the office.

A close up of my desk. Again, I had to be sneaky. 

The one and only, Alicia Simper, a supervisor. 

My supervisor - straight through

Dinner With The Peters

I was so excited when Erika sent me a text inviting me over for dinner at their house! It was the first time I would do something with all of them since Mikey left. I have done a bunch of stuff with Erika, but haven't really spent the evening with Jorjann and Tim. I had dinner over there most Sundays while Mike was home, so it was weird not going over there anymore once he left. Tim and Jorjann always cooked a delightful meal. They are the best. I knew this time would be no different. When I got there, we visited for a while while they were finishing everything up. They were cooking so much food. I knew that Mike would have been in heaven over the meal. He always loved his parents' meals. Who wouldn't? I even got to sit in Mike's spot during dinner!

This made me feel so close to him, but also made me miss him so much. Tim cooked up some BBQ chicken and ribs. Jorjann made twice-baked potatoes (my fave), a wonderful salad medley, and garlic bread. Everything was SO good. I felt like I was at a restaurant. It was so nice to catch up with them as well. I love them just like my own family and can't wait to officially be a part of the family someday soon. 

After dinner we all cleaned up. Erika and I played on her ipad and just talked. Then, we play Wackee Six that I had brought over. Tim also surprised us with adorable little cups of ice cream. So we all ate those and enjoyed our game. Tim was being so hilarious because he did not understand the game. Jorjann caught on quick and was trying to help him! They are all hilarious. It was so fun. Being there with them was just like old times. It was no different than it had been! After the game, we just visited for a while and then it was getting late so I had to go get some homework done. I am so grateful for the time spent with them. I love them all very much and am so lucky to have them in my life. I hope we continue to stay close throughout Mike's mission. 

Twenty Three

Month twenty-three has come and gone. Boy, am I glad. I feel like this month has gone by pretty fast thinking of how long months usually drag on in the life of a missionary girlfriend. Welp... I'm not complaining. It's been a crazy month for Mike and I. He had his first baptism. Her name is Patsy and she is around the age of forty or so. I am so proud of him. His companion got hit by a car and that scares the crap out of me. What a month! Mike had his first transfer, but him and Elder Clarke are staying together still. They have lots of work to do, he says! He loves the food, but he says that he is always hungry. He is getting used to the heat. It even let up on them and rained a whole 24 hours! He sent a picture looking like a wet rat. What a cute soul.

And to get on with my tradition... here is my month 23 picture. So glad this month has come to a close! It was a good month, if I do say so myself. But with September, we're on to new and exciting things.

                                   

Well for the monthly memory... Just the other day I was thinking about the second date that Mike and I had. It was pie night at Village Inn. Mike found out that I like pie and he offered to go with me on a date. We ended up inviting our dear friends Natalie and Jaden. I remember Mike had something for church that night. I can't even remember what... something for Young Men's maybe. But, I remember when he came to get me, he was in a nice white shirt, slacks, and a tie. He looked so cute. He walked up to get me and I remember my mom talking to him about why he was dressed up. I think we talked something about walnuts on the way there. When we got out of the car to walk in he put his arm around me and said, "It's so good to see you." When he said that I really know that I knew that I loved this person. I already such a strong feeling for him and we really hardly even knew each other! Sheesh. We had so much fun with our friends. We had a funny waiter who tried so hard to have us give him a good tip. He pretty much lectured us and we ended up leaving a comment card after about how annoying it was. It made for a good laugh though! Mike took me home and all I really remember was standing outside in my driveway with him under the basket ball hoop - keep in mind that we were still in that kind of awkward stage. I'm sure we gave a good solid hug and he left shortly after. What a precious night. I just knew I loved Mike right from the start. He was always so perfect in my eyes.

Well, month twenty three, you've been good to me! Ta-ta for GOOD. Mikey's comin' home... soon.

Two months down. Twenty-two fabulous months left to go!